Thursday, June 19, 2008

Husband and Father

In today's society is it possible to assume a father is a husband? A reader asked the question as to whether or not a husband and a father are the same thing. I think there was a time that it was indeed the case. Not that every husband was a father, but most fathers were husbands. I wonder what the ratio is today.

I think there are too few fathers today who are also husbands. One has but to look at the crime rates in the inner cities to see the effect of this circumstance. Young men need their fathers to be in their home, in a committed relationship with their mothers, or at least their spouse. The homes that produce many of today's criminals are ones that typically did not have a father in them. This is not to say all fathers are good fathers, or that all criminals come from bad homes.

Crime is not the only outcome of a fatherless home. Sometimes the effects are not as easy to see. Look at the confidence level of a young man without a father and you will see what I am talking about. It may be masked, but there is an insecurity built in to many boys who grew up this way.

Unfortunately there are homes with single fathers, though they are not as widely talked about. Other times a man has paid the ultimate price in service to his country. There are many circumstances in which it is impossible to avoid the absence of a father. It is still possible to raise a strong, confident son in these cases, but it is a much more difficult task.

If you are a husband and a father, I commend you. If you are a father and have not yet married the mother of your children, I would recommend you remedy the situation. We need to return to the place where father's cared enough about their kids to stick around. We need to accept the fact that the traditional family structure is the strongest.

I am a husband and a father. My father was the same, as was his father. I hope that my son(s) will be the same. Our society could use more fathers.

1 comment:

Josh & Becca said...

I agree! Check out this book on the subject: